the pages turn

As much as I would have liked for things to work out between us, I know this is for the best. And though it is the end of one chapter in my personal book of life, it's the beginning of something new. I don't quite know what that something is but I'm sure I will find out sooner or later. I wish I could say that I'm really happy and I'm over it but I think it's going to take some time. I still really care about him and I know he still cares about me; it's just not right and we're not as compatible as a couple should be and I have to accept that. I'm happy in that I know this is the right thing to do, but I guess I'm.... disappointed in a sense because I really saw this working out (prior to Wednesday I suppose) and now it's gone. Oh well, such is life and it's important for me to mourn and move on when I am ready and to celebrate this new chapter in my life and new beginnings and everything else that's new. We're still friends and I know I could just talk to him for hours about nothing important and that would be okay. It's going to be hard for a little while but I know that I'd rather be friends than break things off completely and I think I'm okay with that. I know that sounds dodgy but it's really, honestly how I feel and I think it will be okay because we care so much about each other. I think he's going to turn out to be a really good friend to me and I'm glad that I will be able to be a good friend to him.

And you know, a lot of people (i.e, my parents) who I talked to were concerned about the commitment issue. But I really think the underlying problem was compatibility. I know that we get along and that we're attracted to each other but there's got to be more to it. And while those people may not be terribly impressed with the way he handled things, I know he was doing his best and I know he would have brought it up sooner if he had been able to and I know that he is a good guy. He has definitely given me a good example and I know that a lot of guys just won't measure up anymore. And I guess that's okay.

All that's left is for me to wish, hope, and pray for the best.