fear
Major: Marriage, Family and Human Development
Year in School: Senior
Time left in school: At least 4 semesters.
Other than school, the biggest thing in my life is... well, that's obvious. Things are going well I think. Well, as far as I'm aware. But that just goes to show that even though there can be some rough parts, if there's something there it will all work out. Which is good.
Oh, and I wussed out on a doctor's appointment today. I was supposed to go and find out if I am lactose intolerant (or what it is that makes me feel so... gross). The procedure is to take blood and I just couldn't do it. I was too afraid and so I decided to reschedule. I know it's just putting it off a little bit longer, but I really do have good reasons. I need to psyche myself up for it... they're probably going to take all my blood and it'll squirt all over me and the floor and then I'll pass out and never come to. I'm afraid of pokey objects poking into my skin. And then they're going to tell me that I have to eat gross foods like spinach and lima beans. SICK. At least by then I'll be DEAD because they took all my blood, so it won't matter that I can't enjoy the good things in life.
Just kidding. But honestly, I'm so afraid. I can't believe I'm putting myself through this of my own will. I know it's better for me, and that's why I'm doing it, but it still seems a little strange that I would make myself do something that scares me to death.
Speaking of scary, I'm also afraid of falling down the stairs. So pretty much my apartment is a good experience for me (according to Brian) because the back stairs are incredibly steep and he insists on hugging me WHILE WE'RE STANDING ON THE STAIRS. He says he won't let us fall, but I'm still scared. Apparently this is an exercise in trust. Or something. And I trust him, so it's okay. But I'm still scared. I don't know why this is such a huge fear for me... except that when I was little (probably two or maybe three or four... regardless, I was really little) I fell down the stairs at my grandma's house and I think it knocked me out. I remember falling and then I remember waking up with everyone around me. It's amazing what experiences as little children can do for you later on. I know my fear of falling down the stairs stems from that particular experience, and I can pinpoint other experiences as having a correlation with other fears. Hmm... so, what to do? Skydiving helped (a little bit) with my fear of falling... actually, it helped me with a lot of my fears. For example, if I can jump out of a plane at 15 thousand feet, I can speak in front of 3000 people, because that's only 5 feet for every person. No big deal. And so on.
Year in School: Senior
Time left in school: At least 4 semesters.
Other than school, the biggest thing in my life is... well, that's obvious. Things are going well I think. Well, as far as I'm aware. But that just goes to show that even though there can be some rough parts, if there's something there it will all work out. Which is good.
Oh, and I wussed out on a doctor's appointment today. I was supposed to go and find out if I am lactose intolerant (or what it is that makes me feel so... gross). The procedure is to take blood and I just couldn't do it. I was too afraid and so I decided to reschedule. I know it's just putting it off a little bit longer, but I really do have good reasons. I need to psyche myself up for it... they're probably going to take all my blood and it'll squirt all over me and the floor and then I'll pass out and never come to. I'm afraid of pokey objects poking into my skin. And then they're going to tell me that I have to eat gross foods like spinach and lima beans. SICK. At least by then I'll be DEAD because they took all my blood, so it won't matter that I can't enjoy the good things in life.
Just kidding. But honestly, I'm so afraid. I can't believe I'm putting myself through this of my own will. I know it's better for me, and that's why I'm doing it, but it still seems a little strange that I would make myself do something that scares me to death.
Speaking of scary, I'm also afraid of falling down the stairs. So pretty much my apartment is a good experience for me (according to Brian) because the back stairs are incredibly steep and he insists on hugging me WHILE WE'RE STANDING ON THE STAIRS. He says he won't let us fall, but I'm still scared. Apparently this is an exercise in trust. Or something. And I trust him, so it's okay. But I'm still scared. I don't know why this is such a huge fear for me... except that when I was little (probably two or maybe three or four... regardless, I was really little) I fell down the stairs at my grandma's house and I think it knocked me out. I remember falling and then I remember waking up with everyone around me. It's amazing what experiences as little children can do for you later on. I know my fear of falling down the stairs stems from that particular experience, and I can pinpoint other experiences as having a correlation with other fears. Hmm... so, what to do? Skydiving helped (a little bit) with my fear of falling... actually, it helped me with a lot of my fears. For example, if I can jump out of a plane at 15 thousand feet, I can speak in front of 3000 people, because that's only 5 feet for every person. No big deal. And so on.


1 Comments:
horray for skydiving on may 8th!
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